Mind if I Fart?

You know what really gets my goat?  Every afternoon when I escape the confines of my frigid office walls and begin my ride home with my windows down, enjoying the warmth and sunshine there is always someone in a car next to me smoking with their window open and the cigarette hung out the window.  Sometimes they will have their AC on and their window will only be open enough for their cigarette to be sticking out of the top so that they can infect the air around them more than the air in their own car.  There is nothing like that stench to a non-smoker.  It gets in your car then in your clothes and all you did was dare to open your window for a little air on the ride home.  Even THEY can’t stand the smell so much they stick it out their own window.

What if I hung my butt out the window and just started farting in reply?  What would that do to the balance of things?  I mean, let’s face it, that isn’t even as intrusive or unpleasant because that smell will dissipate pretty quickly.  But what if, out in public, just walking down the street some dude is smoking his cigarette blowing smoke and cancer all over everybody around him without a care in the world but himself and everyone who passes him starts to fart at will, without apology?  How awesome would that be?  We might have some ammunition after all people! 

I know some mighty fine people who are smokers.  I realize it is an addiction.  I still love those people.  I just think they shouldn’t be allowed to smoke within so many feet of non-smokers…especially in traffic.  So, if you ever see me at a stop light with my rear-end hung out of the car pointed toward a smoking window you will know why.  (and also that I just might have finally lost my mind…send for help)  I’m just sayin…   

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